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To "K" m4w
Hey K.
I've got a major confession to make to you, hope you're sitting down and are ready to catch your jaw before it hits the floor.
I'm putting this up here to say what I can't in mixed company - I really like you, I always have. The times that we've spoken have always been a pleasure. You have the most awesome, outgoing personality. You're a person that speaks her mind, instead of being silent. You've always come across as an intelligent person, which is something else that I find attractive. It goes without saying that I'm attracted to you physiy as well. I've just never approached you about it...but one time awhile back when I saw you, I decided I was going to try to get a message to you if I could.
I've hesitated because of how close you are. We have some mutual friends, and you know my wife too. I know your husband, albeit not as well. I've cautiously reached out to you via FB, to meet for lunch; you were out of town and I really haven't had a good opportunity (yet) to try again. I'm sure if you're reading this you are dumbfounded; judging by external appearance, my marriage looks like most of them, generic, happy. But really, things have been awful here for awhile now.
The final straw for me is that I've worked so hard to to make her dreams reality, I've sacrificed my own happiness and well-being, to an extent that I have only begun to discover...for what? For someone that will never be happy. For someone that looks down with disdain on my goals, unless they directly benefit her. For years I've held these feelings back, sometimes with chemical help, sometimes by sheer will alone.
That all changed a few weeks ago. The more my head cleared, the more the scales began to fall away from my eyes. I could go on, but to do so would risk revealing my identity. I'm already taking a huge risk by putting this out here, and I fear that this would severely constrain or destroy my relationship with my children if it gets out. I know that you are on this road too, or at least had been for awhile; the stakes are very high for you too. I'm not supposed to know these things, but I do; I know what you had written about your situation and some of it sounded a lot like what I am experiencing. I'm hoping you see this and at least decide not to tell anyone, if you are not interested.
But if you are, now that I've put this out here, what do we do? I know what I would like to do. For starters, I'd love to meet up, someplace public, and see where it goes. No pressure. I'm not looking to wreck your home or mine. If you are the right person, you will know how to contact me.
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